Saturday, February 5, 2011

Stretch marks

If someone were to ask me, to date, what has been the most stressful event/time in my life, I would, without question, tell them Calvin's newborn feedings. Those feeding issues were the result of a couple of other major stressors: Down syndrome and Complete AV Canal. However, I didn't have to 'deal' with Ds or a CAVC, I had to deal with the symptoms. Or, should I say I will always have to deal with the symptoms.

My sister works with kids, like me. She told a high school boy that he has a lot of energy and that he should focus on using it for the good. While she was looking at it that way, her co-workers (some of them anyway) tended to just complain about an active student. I commend her for what she told him. Why? Because he found her on facebook and told her he will never forget what she said and he is now in the army - using that energy towards good.

I want to embrace all of my children's personality, not just the pieces that work with society or our household at the moment. Take Evan. Evan likes to have things just so or he tends to get anxiously upset. Seeing him like that is not comfortable for me. I tend to blame myself because I was a pretty anxious mom with him. Anyways, he is the way he is. I am not going to try to change that but rather help him slow down at the moment and work through it. He will likely always be like that and it might cause some issues. Nolan. Well, if you have been following long, you know he is a spit-fire. Hence, my conversation with my sister about energy. He will be one that I say "you have a lot of energy, use it for the good." Calvin. His 'symptoms' are less known to me. I do know that I have a life ahead of me that most people do not. At times that is discouraging. To think of such 'normal' lives some are leading. However, I know that is a lie. God does not take 'normal' and dish it out to some. He does not work that way and it is dangerous to start to think otherwise.

I have had to grow up a lot in the past 5 years. That sort of fast and hard growth leaves stretch marks. And just like the ones on my belly, I am proud of them. I am thankful for them.

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